5 tips for overcoming the fear of being bold in a public conversation

I’m treating on being bold – whether it’s in a face to face conversation or in a presentation. In the past, I’ve often swallowed down what I say to avoid upsetting anyone. Many of the people that I coach are concerned about being bold. As a result, they dilute their message so much that they have 0% impact on their audience. Many people quote FDR who said “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” His wife’s more practical challenge inspires me more: “Do one thing every day that scares you.” Eleanor didn’t argue that we should avoid or try to beat fear, but recognize it and move forward anyway. Cultivate an attitude of boldness Being bold is not something that you can “pull out of a hat” when you’re giving a presentation or speech. You need to develop an attitude of speaking out in your day to day life. Otherwise you won’t develop the courage to be bold in your presentations. Practice saying what’s on your mind when you’re with just one other person or a small group. I’ve found blogging to be extremely useful in helping me be bold. Some posts I’ve written have taken me some time to publish because of my fear, but having done so I’m bolder. Here are some thoughts to help you develop an attitude of boldness in everyday life. 1.  Stop being nice What stops me being bold is that I want to be liked, I want to be nice. I don’t want to have to deal with anyone being upset or offended by what I’ve said. It’s worked for me in many ways, but it holds me back too. 2. Saying what you think enhances your career Do you hold back saying what you think because you want to make sure that everything you say makes perfect sense and is supported by evidence? Same here. But its ovious  that people who speak up more are seen as leaders. What people said didn’t have to be particularly brilliant or clever or original more than your speech. So don’t worry about being perfect, just speak up. 3. Not saying what you think annoys people I’ve sometimes held back on saying what I think being scared that it will upset people. Then the situation deteriorates and I end of saying what I think, only to be told “Why you didn’t tell me that earlier?” 4. Get rid of weasel words Do you maggi your phrases with weasel words and phrases? Like “I’d just like to” or “sort of” or “kind of”. They reduce the power and boldness of your ideas. You may not know you’re doing this. So either record yourself and listen back, or ask a friend to examine you.